Seasonal Segue

Last month I wrote about Lederhosen (and 350). Speaking of German words... it's time to segue into the next holiday! A year ago this time, my son was wandering around on Thanksgiving, quoting a cartoon of mine he'd found in a pile of rough drafts. Then he and a few awesome friends did a "dramatic cartoon reading" of it at my book launch. Here 'tis... Read more

Hymn to Asphaltia (Goddess of Parking & Traffic)

Press 'play' on both tracks at once... close your eyes and listen...  
When you're done, scroll down and click the cartoon.... 

1. Goddess of Parking and Traffic by and courtesy of David Garner

2. Hymn to Asphaltia read by Kristen Caven at Heart of the Muse, 11/4/10

I sing to thee, Asphaltia!

To thy hard and pulsing veins

ribbons of desire and direction that

connect our home driveways,

one to the other,

across this great and blessed land!

I sing thy praise, Asphaltia!

Goddess of Parking and Traffic,

before these, thy blessed servants,

devoted drivers of thy scenic roads!

I offer thee this sacrifice:

A mangled bike.

A twisted wheel.

For you, benevolent goddess of the streets,

there are not enough poems in my grateful soul

to express my delight

in your watchful eye.

I praise and thank thee tonight!

For the grip you gave the screeching tires when the driver saw the child.

For the clear streets that swiftly brought the ambulance.

For the green lights as I followed the sound, screaming in my car.

For the pavement you made soft where he landed.

(There were no broken bones or skin.)

Asphaltia, I praise thee!

Our devotion is our salvation:

To the zipper dance of merging manners;

To the air in the tires of your prayer-wheels;

To the tar we pour to patch the scars in your skin.

Our attention to your ever-blinking eyes of light.

There are not enough words in my ravaged soul

to thank you

for preserving

my beloved.

(Oh, and for that sweet parking spot you gave me tonight.)

-kristen caven 11/4/10