I Am Woman, Hear Me...Cry?

In preparation for Hillary Clinton's landslide win on election day, I choreographed "I Am Woman" by Helen Reddy for my Zumba class. In searching for this feminist anthem on iTunes, I flashed back to my first rock concert (with my divorced-and-discovering-her-power mom), and then stumbled on this generation's version.

When you compare the lyrics to Jordin Sparks' (yes, highly dance-able) "empowering female anthem" from 2011 to those from the song that hit #1 on the Billboard pop charts in 1972, it's easy to see how today's women could have voted for an unapologetic misogynist.

Her lyrics, It ain't easy walkin' in stilettos/But somebody gotta do it; It's so rigorous
Doing what I do / Always on point / Always on cue; Don't need to talk / I speak with actions / I've perfected the laws of attraction / I'm the whole package plus satisfaction, bespeak the traps of perfection that today's young women find themselves in, always under someone's gaze, someone's judgment, with no deep self-connection. Trump's women—wives, daughters, hangers-on—are to a one shaped like Barbie, with hair-commercial locks, dresses over smooth bellies and teetering high heels. You get the feeling they'd better look like that or they're fired.

Reddy's lyrics "from the olden days" spoke of connection ("standing toe-to-toe") with other women, of wisdom, pain, and strength, and the incredible, generous heart of mothers and lovers, ready to "spread my loving arms across the land." Also, it politely acknowledged the impossible struggle women have with politics and with men, "With a long, long way to go/Until I make my brother understand." It is women seeing women from the inside.

Today, many women are crying. Our hardworking but unfuckable heroine was smeared by lying Russian trolls and a candidate who made bullying cool (for some), tapping into the vast community of voters who are suspicious of women (and anyone different from themselves).

 There will be another cry, coming very soon. And it will not be one of sadness. It will be a roar. 

Muse Madness!

I am usually crazy confident about titling my works, but coming up with a title for my winning work in the 2016 Lake Merritt Flash Mob Play Festival was harder than writing the play itself!

The original title was "Disgruntled Muse." I didn't want an adjective-Muse title, since I just re-named my newsletter (muse-letter?) "Generous Muse." And I have worked hard to have a positive relationship with my muses... want to keep it that way!

I came up with over 50 potential titles, based on the contents and theme of the play... with help from a rhyming dictionary and thesaurus, of course!

1. A Goose Waits in Oakland
2. A Kick From a Muse
3. A Muse and a Goose
4. A Muse Crosses the Street
5. A Muse Grows in Oakland
6. A Plague of Muses
7. A Push from the Muse
8. Abused by the Muse
9. Bossy Muse Blues
10. Can't Stop the Muses
11. Choose the Muse
12. Choosing the Muse
13. Confused by the Muse
14. Control your muses
15. Cuddle the Muse
16. Dances with Muses
17. Demands of the Muse
18. Distressing the Muse
19. Don't Mess With the Muse
20. Embracing the Muse
21. Goose from a Muse
22. Goosed by the Muse
23. Juice of the Muse
24. Kill my muses
25. Mad at the Muse
26. Make Way for Muses!
27. Muse Calling
28. Muse Madness
29. Muse Sings the Blues
30. Muse Trouble
31. Muse-a-palooza
32. Muse, Don’t Abuse
33. Museday Afternoon
34. Muses Made Me Do It
35. Not A-mused.
36. Perfectionist Muse
37. Persnickety Muse
38. Plagued by Muses
39. Provoking the Muses
40. Refusing the Muse
41. Seduced by the Muse
42. Seize the Muse
43. Shaking the Muse
44. Sing with the Muse
45. Slave to the Muse
46. The Madness of the Muse
47. The Muse Moves 
48. The Trouble With Muses
49. Tighten the Muse
50. Turn of the Muse
51. View from the Muse
52. Voice of the Muse
53. Wealth of the Muse

Sifting out the negative ones (wanting a more neutral tone for the title), I selected the top six that I thought were memorable, evocative (of a feeling or another cultural reference), and carried the right sort of exciting energy:

• Be Mused
• Bossy Muse Blues
• Choose the Muse
• Muse Madness
• Museday Afternoon
• The Trouble with Muses

And then I set about pestering friends and family. I asked a few dozen writers and other creatives to vote for their favorites. Of course, most of them were much more clever than me, suggesting even more truly wonderful ideas, such as:

• If you Give a Muse a Muffin 
• Win Some, Muse Some
• Muse En Scéne
• Blue Suede Muse
• The M-Spot
• Afternoon with the Muse
• BeMuse
• Beggars can't be Musers (however, in my play, they can...)
• Dark Side of the Muse (my personal fave)

Ultimately, the poll results were clear. Be Mused (which my aMUSEing husband shouted out a week before I thought of it), won definitively. An equal number of votes were split between The Trouble with Muses and Bossy Muse Blues, with a few clear votes for Muse Madness.

"I don't find this stuff amusing anymore." —Paul Simon, Graceland

Fool's Errand

You fooled me once
Thinking we could fool around;
‘Cause you don’t suffer fools
And I’m nobody’s fool.

But you rushed in
To act the fool
To part with money
To fool away your life
With me.

I took you for a fool
Made a fool of myself
Played the fool
For you.
With you.

You could've fooled me
But you weren’t fooling.
You were no fool.
You stepped off that cliff
And caught me before I fell.

So tee-hee, I declare:

Fooling around
With you
Is a certain kind
Of paradise.

Happy Today.

KBC to DCC
4/1/16

(Originally hack-posted to Entropical Paradise...)

A Nifty Superbowl Craft!

 We try to keep our football parties fun for everyone... and now we're sharing our favorite Superbowl craft for you to share with your guests!

As seen on Instructables & Medium.

Download the template here.